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Olivia Rodrigo, The Grudge: the song lyrics & meaning

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GUTS, the second official album released by Olivia Rodrigo on September 8, 2023, was one of the most awaited releases of the year. The American singer had already published two singles, Vampire and Bad Idea Right?, exposing the contents she’s dealing with in this phase of her life. The Grudge contains some of the most important lyrics in the album, talking about feelings that left a mark on Olivia’s mind. Let’s explore the song’s meaning, and you’ll also find the complete lyrics and the full streaming at the end of this article.

The Grudge: the song lyrics & meaning

The Grudge is a song about the pain of a breakup. In the lyrics, Olivia Rodrigo recalls something that happened “A Friday in May,” and fans have identified what she refers to: in her documentary Driving Home 2 U, Olivia tells the story of a boy who broke up with her with a phone call, in a Friday of May 2020. That breakup still hurts; the pain this guy has inflicted on her with his behavior is still present in her mind. We don’t know who this guy is, though.

Olivia Rodrigo trusted this guy and their relationship. Based on the lyrics in The Grudge, that phone call betrayed her trust, changing her whole life.

I have nightmares each week ’bout that Friday in May
One phone call from you and my entire world was changed
Trust that you betrayed, confusion that still lingers
Took everything I loved and crushed it in between your fingers

We can see that as a mere description of facts. After that, Olivia Rodrigo analyses how that could have happened: is he aware of the pain he gave her? Does he have enough empathy to understand what he really did? Some people are more selfish than others, and we know that. They make decisions based exclusively on their own interest, and if those decisions crash someone, they focus on something else, avoiding guilt. This seems to be what happened to Olivia Rodrigo in 2020.

And I doubt you ever think about the damage that you did
But I hold onto every detail like my life depends on it
My undying love, now I hold it like a grudge
Now I hear your voice every time that I think I’m not enough

Olivia shows a unique talent in expressing the mixed feelings of a breakup. The logical part of us perfectly knows that this person hurt us. We know he represents a danger. But our emotions need a little more time in these cases, especially if we receive ambiguous signs from that person. The singer has no problem admitting it: she still feels love. Her love is not dying. And she holds it “like a grudge”: a poetic way to explain that, probably, she must be having other feelings towards him, but love still holds up.

I say I don’t care, I say that I’m fine
But you know I can’t let it go, I’ve tried, I’ve tried, I’ve tried for so long
It takes strength to forgive, but I don’t feel strong

The last line you read above can be considered crucial: Olivia Rodrigo believes that the only way to move on is to find peace around the breakup and forgive him. But the best emotional approach could actually be the opposite: we tend to refuse “negative” feelings, like hate and anger against those who hurt us, as something that shall be rejected, as a shadow we should never adopt. But as we know from modern psychology, hate and anger can be beneficial emotions that help us recalibrate our balance. If we allow ourselves to hate the one who hurt us, even temporarily, we can better reduce our residual love for them, which prevents us from moving on.

The second part of the song tries to explain what happened. Why do people hurt us? What can happen in someone’s life that turns them into bad people? Those are always interesting questions, a personal attempt to deal with pain. But it’s impossible to have a final answer to those questions. So, the best outcome of these reflections is the easiest: those people must stay far from us because they affect our wellness. They don’t need more attention than that from us.

And I try to be tough, but I wanna scream
How could anybody do the things you did so easily?

This is the ultimate meaning of the lyrics inside Olivia Rodrigo’s The Grudge: I’m still in pain for what you did to me, years later. But I cannot move on. I still feel love, and that still prevents me from moving on. With The Grudge, Olivia Rodrigo shares the typical feelings of a bad breakup, something we can all relate to.

Read other popular song lyrics and their meaning on Auralcrave

The full streaming and the song lyrics

Olivia Rodrigo - the grudge (Official Lyric Video)
Watch this video on YouTube.

I have nightmares each week ’bout that Friday in May
One phone call from you and my entire world was changed
Trust that you betrayed, confusion that still lingers
Took everything I loved and crushed it in between your fingers
And I doubt you ever think about the damage that you did
But I hold onto every detail like my life depends on it
My undying love, now I hold it like a grudge
Now I hear your voice every time that I think I’m not enough

And I try to be tough, but I wanna scream
How could anybody do the things you did so easily?
And I say I don’t care, I say that I’m fine
But you know I can’t let it go, I’ve tried, I’ve tried, I’ve tried for so long
It takes strength to forgive, but I don’t feel strong

The arguments that I’ve won against you in my head
In the shower, in the car, and in the mirror before bed
Yeah, I’m so tough when I’m alone, and I make you feel so guilty
And I fantasize about a time you’re a little f–kin’ sorry
And I try to understand why you would do this all to me
You must be insecure, you must be so unhappy
And I know, in my heart, hurt people hurt people
And we both drew blood, but, man, those cuts were never equal

And I try to be tough, but I wanna scream
How could anybody do the things you did so easily?
And I say I don’t care, I say that I’m fine
But you know I can’t let it go, I’ve tried, I’ve tried, I’ve tried for so long
It takes strength to forgive, but I don’t feel strong

Ooh, ooh-ooh, do you think I deserved it all?
Ooh, ooh-ooh, your flower’s filled with vitriol
You built me up to watch me fall
You have everything, and you still want more

I try to be tough, I try to be mean
But even after all this, you’re still everything to me
And I know you don’t care, I guess that that’s fine
But you know I can’t let it go, I’ve tried, I’ve tried, I’ve tried for so long
It takes strength to forgive, but I’m not quite sure I’m there yet
It takes strength to forgive, but

Published by Carlo Affatigato

Carlo has been a web content creator for over 10 years. He founded Auralcrave in 2015, envisioning it as a new space capable of offering different perspectives on topics that passionate all of us. With a scientific background, Carlo developed an interest in music, cinema, literature, and art at a young age, transforming it into a complementary dimension to his professional growth. For years, he was a music journalist specializing in electronic and dance music, writing for the most important Italian magazines (both online and print). Movies and TV series have been a true obsession in many phases of his life: during university, it was not uncommon for him to set the alarm in the middle of the night to watch classic films airing on TV. With the advent of the Internet, Carlo became a keen observer of web and social phenomena, addressing light topics such as advertising, trends, fashion, and general themes. He is the main author of Auralcrave and personally manages its social media, editorial line, book publication, resource management, and business expansion. A former engineer, life coach, husband, and father, he believes that every area of knowledge has interesting stories that deserve to be told and is convinced that doing so makes the world a better place.